Favorite Albums

Here is a list of my favorite albums to date. These are listed in no particular order, only alphabetically.

All Time Low – So Wrong, It’s Right

Allister – Last Stop Suburbia

Anberlin – Cities / Anberlin – Never Take Friendship Personal

Augustana – All The Stars and Boulevards

Bayside – Shudder

Blink 182 – Enema of the State / Blink 182 – Take Off Your Pants and Jacket

Bob Marley – Legend

Cartel – Chroma

Coldplay – A Rush of Blood To The Head

Days Away – Mapping An Invisible World

The Early November – The Room’s Too Cold

Ellegarden – Eleven Fire Crackers

Emery – The Question

Ever We Fall – We Are But Human

Finch – What It Is To Burn

Foo Fighters – There Is Nothing Left To Lose

The Format – Interventions and Lullabies / The Format – Dog Problems

Funeral For A Friend – Hours

Further Seems Forever – Hide Nothing

The Graduate - Anhedonia

Hellogoodbye – Hellogoodbye EP

Hidden in Plain View – Life In Dreaming

Hit The Lights – Skip School, Start Fights

I Can Make A Mess Like Nobody’s Business – I Can Make A Mess Like Nobody’s Business

Jack’s Mannequin – Everything In Transit

The John Butler Trio – Live At St. Gallen

John Mayer – Heavier Things

Kaddisfly – Set Sail The Prairie

Lifehouse – No Name Face

Linkin Park – Hybrid Theory / Linkin Park - Meteora

Mae – The Everglow

Matisyahu – Live At Stubb’s

Moving Mountains – Pneuma

Never Heart Of It – 11 Days

Over It – Timing Is Everything / Over It - Silverstrand

The Receiving End of Sirens – Between The Heart and the Synapse

The Reign of Kindo – Rhythm, Chord & Melody

Rise Against – The Sufferer & the Witness

Rocky Votolato – Makers

Rookie of the Year – The Goodnight Moon

Rx Bandits – The Resignation

Saosin – Saosin

Say Anything – In Defense of the Genre

The Secret Show – Impressionist Road Map of the West

Senses Fail – Let It Enfold / Senses Fail – Still Searching

Sherwood – Sing, But Keep Going

The Shins – Oh, Inverted World / The Shins – Chutes Too Narrow / The Shins – Wincing The Night Away

Silverstein – Discovering The Waterfront

The Starting Line – Say It Like You Mean It

Story of the Year – Page Avenue

Sufjan Stevens – Illinois

Taking Back Sunday – Tell All Your Friends

Thrice – Vheissu

Thursday – War All The Time

Underoath – Define The Great Line

The Used – The Used

Vampire Weekend – Vampire Weekend

Yellowcard - Ocean Avenue

The Last Day Of The Beginning Of My Life

There aren't a lot of moments in your life that you know are milestones. Other than the obvious ones such as the birth of a child, your wedding day, etc. However, I knew a moment I was in marked the last day of the beginning of my life.

For me it was August 25th, 2008. That night as I laid sleepless, knowing that I was closing one chapter of my life, and beginning a new one. It's hard to express how that night felt without deluding the experience. I realized that night would be the last of my youth, or simply everything that had accumulated to what the days after would bring.

Fully aware of such an experience, I consciously attempted to soak it all in, taking advantage of a rare life experience. I'm glad I was restless that night. There was no way I'd be able to sleep with my mind racing anxiously like a man on his death bed with only minutes to live.

A month and a half since that moment, I feel the same, if not more strongly, that that night will always be seen as a life transition. Wondering what the next month and a half would bring has been completely true. The life I live now has seemed increasingly detached to my first life period. I don't know if I call it maturing since people don't just wake up "mature". I just see it as a new chapter. I see one life that has ended, and now have begun a new one.

I implore you to evaluate the circumstances of your life. To know what stage of your life you are in, and if a change is approaching. Life is fast and uncontrollable in so many ways. If anything, when you notice a life changing moment, you give yourself a better chance of reconciling your past and preparing for the future.

This is all hard to explain, but I'll try it this way. It's strange to be a part of your own funeral.

The Earth Sings Mi Fa Mi

I lay politely and contemplate nightly
As the dark sky swallows people whole
The shadows on the wall don't seem so frightening
If I listen I can hear the crop and pest
The salesman, the husband, the lover, the rest
The shadows on the wall provide me a test
Is it smoke? Is it mirrors? From the east? From the west?
A realization of the ear to be heard for years
As Saturnus and the wanderers dance in good cheer
They stay small and hide in the music of spheres
While the heir of empty breath rears her pale blue dot
Its the thought that counts when I finally fall asleep
And I wait for tomorrow for the deepest of dreams
When the Earth Sings Mi Fa Mi

Time Wasted

We spend too much of our lives doing things we don't want to. It's like we exist only to exist some more. We live so that we keep living. Never living for the moment. We're always doing things we don't want to do. We're always at places we don't want to be. We settle in jobs that we hate, accepting all the negativity it brings into our lives and radiating that to our loved ones.

At what point is it that it's good to be in these situations? To the point of debilitation? How about never? I think we're all juggling this idea, trying to find the medium between time spent doing things we don't want to do and time spent doing things we love doing. I think the key to making the most out of life is to always find yourself in positive situations.

If sin exists, then wasting your life away must be one of them.

Desire

How possible is it that you are actually incapable of doing something? As imperfect beings, can we truly do ANYTHING? Most would assume that we're better off thinking that all things are possible. However, it reminds me of the basic Buddhist belief that desire brings suffering. If you cease to desire, you can find true happiness, achieving nirvana. For many that's a concept that is blasphemous. We are so driven on worldly things that the thought of not wanting things is inconceivable. I'm not picking a side, but it's a good topic for discussion.

If you don't desire, you can never be let down. However, achievement often brings great joy. With the way the world has been built, can you survive by not desiring anything? Social Darwinism would like us to believe that only the strong survive in society. Can you be strong without desiring to be the best? Then again, what is considered "strong"? What is considered achievement? To some, a lack of desire IS suffering. It's such a radical difference in one's psychology. Maybe we are built as such that we're programmed to subconsciously accept either way of life. That is, finding happiness in trying to be "the best" or finding happiness without being tied down to our own (possibly unachievable?) desires. What are you better off attempting to do, nothing or everything?

Body and Mind

Acting upon your feelings is always harder than it seems. Why do you think this is? The mind has an incredible control on the body. In fact, you can deny your feelings to the point that it makes you sick. Physically sick. Maybe it is your body's way of telling you "I NEED YOU TO DO THIS." Your mind and body will fight until you give in or give up. Obviously some people rarely battle with their feelings, as acting upon them is not an issue for consideration. They act without questioning. In all likelihood that is exactly what your mind wants.

So, what is left of those who constantly ignore what their mind is telling them? Are they the pill poppers and heavy drinkers? Are the ones that go as far as taking their own lives the ones that have the most internal turmoil? Probably. It makes sense. The body can only take so much.

In a deeper question, can the body truly overcome the mind? It seems much more likely that the mind could overcome the body, as it seems many people act without thinking. If you had to choose between the two extremes, would you rather have full control over your mind (thinking) or body (acting)? Too be honest, I am not really sure yet.

The Scale of Life

Something I have noticed as we get older is how the scale of our life changes. Sometimes it broadens, and sometimes it shrinks. When you are a child, the world is merely what you see. Your little school, your little friends, your little family, your little neighborhood, etc. Through your teenage years it may broaden, but still be confined to the walls of your high school. Then, before you know it, you're out on your own. The scale at which you consider "life" broadens immensely, maybe globally. For the first time, something that may happen far away from you has some type of affect on you. You want to stretch your arms around the world in hopes of saving it. Then, your scope on life sharpens down as small as it may ever be. You may meet someone that narrows down your scope of life on that person, and not much more. Your own family may came as a result which sharpens your view on life to those people that you care about. And from this point on, it seems nothing else matters.

For all people, the scale at which we consider life is different. What affects one person may not affect another. Having a broad spectrum on life may or may not be bad, but it would be nice, if at the very least, we could be more aware of what's happening beyond our current scope on life. However, it may be our inherent nature to only focus on what we feel affects us.